Goofy Bloopers And Deleted Scenes
by ScorpioGirl1987
Summary: Title says all! These are outtakes, deleted scenes, and alternate scenes from both Goofy movies. Includes mature content, pop culture references, and insanity! READ AT YOUR OWN RISK! Characters might be slightly OOC. Now complete.
1. Max's Many Personalities

**This is a little something for me to get over writer's block. I've done some blooper fanfics, but they never made it to this site, so...I decided to give it a try for real.**

**This has bloopers, deleted scenes, and alternate scenes from both Goofy movies. I do not own the Goofy movies. They belong to Disney.**

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We encounter a grassy field under a bright blue sky. An eerie voice calls out "Maaaaax..."

Max poops up on screen and accidentally hits the camera.

"Ow! Geez!" Everyone burst out laughing, while Max clutches his nose and glares at everyone. "Oh, ha-ha. Was that really necessary?"

"Yes." The director smirked. He sobered up. "Okay, let's try this again..."

XX

Max and Roxanne lay on the grass laughing and enjoying each other. They prop on their elbows and smile at each other. Roxanne leans towards Max, then gasps as she sees Max growing facial hair.

"What's wrong?" Max asked, concerned. Then he realized...HE'S TUIRNING INTO A WEREWOLF! "AAAAAAAH! NOOOO-AOOOOO!"

Thriller by Micheal Jackson starts playing. Max and Roxanne stare at the director weirdly, shrug, and start dancing to the music.

The director just laughed. "Okay, you've had your fun. Cut!"

_(Take 2)_

Roxanne gasps as she sees Max turn into Kovu from _The Lion King 2 Simba's Pride_. Roxanne screams, and Max lets out a mighty roar.

The cameraman raises an eyebrow at the director, who chuckled, embarrassed.

"Sorry. My daughter was watching _The Lion King 2_ earlier, so...yeah. I couldn't resist..."

_(Take 3)_

Roxanne gasps as she sees Max grow black fur over his face.

"What's wrong?" Max asked concerned. He gasped as he realized he now has black fur all over. His nose shrinks, he grows whiskers, and his whole body shrinks as he turned into a black cat. He meowed.

"Awwww!" Roxanne gushed. "You look so cute!"

Max just glared at Roxanne, then turned to the director. "Who'd you turn me into this time?!"

"Binx from _Hocus Pocus_." The director admitted.

Max's left eye began to twitch. "And why, pray tell, did you turn me into these animals?" He asked calmly.

"I...uh...well..." The director started sweating. "Your voice actor, Jason Marsden voiced all of you- Binx, Kovu, Max...I just thought it'd be funny."

"Okay." Max nodded. "Now...if you don't mind, I'd like to be turned back into Max, please."

"All right, all right, sorry..."

XXX

Max wakes up from his nightmare and checks to make sure he's still him. He sighs in relief, and his phone rings. He jumps slightly, fumbles with the receiver, and falls out of his bed taking the phone with him.

"...I'm okay."

XX

"Max! Where the heck are you, man?" PJ demanded over the phone.

Max sat up on his bed. "PJ?"

"You were supposed to be here an hour ago!"

"What are you-" Looks at clock which read "5:23".

"CUT!" The director yelled.

"What?" Max asked

"What does the clock say?"

"5:23."

"Ok, who set that clock?! It's supposed to read 4:02! NOT 5:23!" The director shook his fists.

"What does it matter as long as I notice I'm running late?" Max asked, again.

"Can it, pipsqueak! I don't pay you to annoy the hell out of me!" The director snapped.

"YOUR MOM PAYS ME TO SLEEP WITH HER!" Max retorted.

"OOOOHHHHHH!" The crew chorused.

The director glared daggers at Max and pushed his sleeves up. "Oh, that does it..." He lunged for Max, but the cameraman held him back. "Let me at him! Let me at him!"

XX

_'Just think of all the time I've been losing-'_

As Max jumped down from the fire hydrant, he accidentally landed on a bird. He jumped off and landed on another bird. The flock of birds get mad and proceeds to peck Max angrily.

"AAAH! GET 'EM OFF ME! GET 'EM OFF ME!"

The director laughed hysterically. "Karma's a bitch, ain't it, Max?"

XX

As Max walks down the hall, a redhead with a ponytail got pinched on the butt from behind.

"OH MY GOD! SEXUAL HARASSMENT IN A DISNEY MOVIE????!!!!"

"Who is that?" The cameraman asked.

"The Disney Censorship Team." The director replied. "I am in such major trouble..."

XX

"Look, Max, if my dad sees me with his camera, he'll kill me!" PJ said, pulling his camera out of his locker. "Are you sure you gotta do this?"

"It's my only chance, Peej." Max replied. "To Roxanne, I'm...I'm just a nobody..."

Sora from _Kingdom Hearts_ appears out of nowhere. "NOBODIES?!" He brandishes his keyblade. "WHERE?!"

Max and PJ stared. "Wrong show, dude."

XXX

Max continues walking down a hallway. Eric Matthews from _Boy Meets World_ pops out of nowhere. "Whoa!" Max exclaimed.

"Jason?! Holy crap! It's you!" Eric hugged Max tightly.

"What the hell?!" Max pushed Eric off. Eric continued.

"I wondered where you disappeared to! I haven't seen you forever!" Eric exclaimed.

"Dude, what are you talking about?" Max asked, slightly irritated. "My name isn't Jason. It's Max!"

"....Ohhhh...sorry." Eric runs off.

Max sighed and rubs his forehead. "The things I do for money..."

XX

"As your student body president, I just wanna say like 'yay' to all of us for a really neat year." Stacy told her audience.

"Yo, Stacy! Your rack is friggin' awesome!" A nerd shouted.

Stacy glared at the nerd and shot him with a tranquilizer dart.

XX

Max peeps through the curtains of the auditorium and looks on in horror as he sees some guy talking to Roxanne.

"...Hey, doesn't Max look like Mickey Mouse?" The cameraman asked.

Mickey hears this and gasps. "MINNIE! HOW COULD YOU!?" He runs off crying.

"Mickey, wait!" Minnie shouted desperately. "I CAN EXPLAIN!"

"...Ahyuck! That was random." Goofy commented.

"GOOFY! I WILL KILL YOU AND YOU WILL STAY DEAD THIS TIME!" Mickey screamed angrily, brandishing a bazooka.

Goofy's eyes widened in horror, and he sprinted off with Mickey in hot pursuit. "IT'S NOT MY FAULT! IT'S THE AUTHORS"!"

XX

"I don't know why I let you guys talk me into this." PJ complained. "If my dad finds out, he's gonna nuke my entire existence." He struggles with a cord and tripped onstage, throwing the camera off the stage.

"Cut!"

XX

"How about science slumber parties?" Mazur suggested, smiling. Nothing happens. He repeats his lines and still nothing happens. "Okay, what the hell?!"

"Max! What are you doing? Your cue's up!" The director yelled.

"Okay, I'll bet three hundred red and put in 50 blue." Max told PJ and Bobby.

"MAX!" The director shrieked.

Max looks at the director. "Oh! Sorry! Was that my cue?"

The director slapped his forehead.

XX

_'To stand out_

_Above the crowd_

_Even if I gotta shout out loud_

_Til mine is the only face you'll see_

_Gonna stand out..."_

Max swings on the rope he's hooked on towards Roxanne and falls to the ground. "I'm okay."

XX

_'Gonna stand out..."_

the music stops playing, and Max hurls towards Mazur. The rope breaks, and Max tackles Mazur to the ground.

"Okay, that sucked..."

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**Well, what do you think? No flames, please!**


	2. They Just Can't Help Themselves

"...So, my theme's gonna be 'Powerline Goes Rainforest'." Stacy was telling Roxanne, who wasn't listening. "Roxanne, are you listening?" She looks in Roxanne's direction and smiles. "Aaahh." She clicked hr tongue, wriggled her eyebrows and pushed her friend forward.

"Stacy, no! I don't wanna talk..." Roxanne protested.

"Talk to him!" Stacy urged.

Roxanne cleared her throat twice. Max didn't respond. Roxanne shrugged at Stacy.

"Tap him!" Stacy advised.

Roxanne taps Max twice, which startles Max. He jumped up accidentally hitting Roxanne in the face. Roxanne cried out in pain and clutched her nose.

"Oh! Ohhh, I'm so sorry! I wasn't looking!" Max exclaimed, cringing. "Are you okay?"

"Oh, you really clocked me there." Roxanne said thickly. "Am I bleeding?"

"I'm so sorry." Max said again.

"It's okay."

"Medic!" The director sighed.

XXX

The phone in Goofy's office rings. Goofy answers it.

"Hello?"

"Ah, yes,. Mr. Goof." Principal Mazur said over the phone. "I'm calling in regards to your son Maximi8llian."

"Max?" Goofy asked, concerned. He clutched the end of the reciever with his free hand. "Oh my gosh. Is he hurt?"

"Oh, yeah. 'Cause that's the only reason why I would call." Mazur said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Well, you don't have to be sarcastic..."

(Take 2)

"Speed...marker"

"No, Mr. Goof. He's in trouble!" Mazur replied over the phone.

"Has he been taken hostage by Heartless and is going be uwsed as leverage against me?" Goofy asked.

"...What? No!"

"Ohhhh, you mean 'detention' trouble, then!" Goofy surmised.

"Yeah, pretty much."

"CUT!" The director yelled.

(Take 3)

"Trouble? What kind of trouble?" Goofy asked, getting more concerned.

"Dressed like a gang member..."

"Gang member?"

"...Your son caused the entire student body to break out into a riotous frenzy!"

"Riot? Couldn't be my-"

"Oh, you're really not gonna use _that_ one, are you?" Mazur asked.

"Cut!" The director was growing frustrated. "Can we PLEASE get this right?"

(Take 4)

"If I were you, Mr. Goof, I'd seriously reevaluate the way you're raising your child, before he ends up IN THE ELERCTRIC CHAIR!" Mazur yelled those last few words, then hung up.

Goofy's eyes widened, and he gaped in shock at the receiver. He simmers, then calls Mazur back.

"Principal Mazur? Goofy Goof is on line three." Miss Maples said.

"Why? I just called him!" Mazur sighed. He picked yup the receiver. "Mazur."

"You know what, Mazur? You are the biggest most dramatic, douchebag it has ever been my misfortune to know." Goofy said angrily.

"Excuse me?"

"Just because my son hijacked your assembly doers not- I repeat- _does not_ give you the right to threaten the electric chair! You went to far, you son of a bitch. So lighten up, or the school board will hear of your pathetic vendetta against an innocent student. Take piano lessons or something! Good day!"

"What the hell-"

"I SAID GOOD DAY!" Goofy slammed the receiver on the hook. He panted for breath, and turned around to see Pete giving him a strange look. "What?"

(Take 5)

The phone rings. Goofy answers it. "Hello?"

"Hey, is Pete there?" Asked a voice.

"Why, yes. Hold on." Goofy turned away from the phone. "Hey, Pete! Phone for you!"

"All right, I'm comin'." Pete walked over and took the phone. "Hello?"

"STOP BREAKING THE LAW, ASSHOLE!" The caller screamed through the phone.

Goofy cringed. "Gawrsh..."

Pete rubbed his ear and glared at the receiver. "Who is this?"

"It sounded like Sora."

Pete clenched his fists, gritted his teeth, and growled. "I'LL KILL THAT MOTHERF-"

"HERY! There are little kids here!" A customer shouted.

"Cut!"

XXX

The last bell rang, the students cheered, and music started playing.

_What time is it?_

_Summertime_

_It's our vacation_

_What time is it?_

_Party time_

_That's right_

_Say it loud_

_What time is it?_

_Time of our lives_

_Anticipation_

_What time is it?_

_Summertime_

_School's out_

_Scream and shout_

_Max:_

_Finally summer's here_

_Good to be chillin' out_

_I'm off the clock_

_The pressure's out_

_Now my girl's what it's all about_

_Roxanne:_

_Ready for some sunshine_

_For my heart to take a chance_

_I'm here to stay_

_Not movin' away_

_Ready for a summer romance_

_Max and Roxanne:_

_Everybody ready_

_Goin' crazy, yeah we're out_

_Come on and let me hear you_

_say it now_

_Right now_

_Everyone:_

_What time is it?_

_Summertime_

_It's our vacation_

_What time is it?_

_Party time_

_That's right_

_Say it loud_

_What time is it?_

_Time of our lives_

_Anticipation_

_What time is it?_

_Summertime_

_School's out_

_Scream and shout_

_Stacy:_

_Goodbye to rules_

_No summer school_

_I'm free to shop till I drop_

_Bobby:_

_It's an education vacation_

_Stacy and Bobby:_

_And the party never has to stop_

_Stacy:_

_We've got things to do_

_We'll see you soon_

_Bobby:_

_And we're really gonna miss you all_

_Stacy:_

_Goodbye to you and you_

_Bobby:_

_And you and you_

_Stacy:_

_Bye, bye_

_Stacy and Bobby:_

_Until next fall_

_Stacy[speaking]:_

_Bye bye_

_Stacy and Bobby:_

_Everybody ready_

_Goin' crazy, yeah we're out_

_Come on and let me hear you_

_say it now_

_Right now_

_Everyone:_

_What time is it?_

_Summertime_

_It's our vacation_

_What time is it?_

_Party time_

_That's right_

_Say it loud_

_What time is it?_

_Time of our lives_

_Anticipation_

_What time is it?_

_Summertime_

_School's out_

_Scream and shout_

_Max and Roxanne:_

_No more waking up at 6 A.M._

_'Cause now our time is all our own_

_Stacy and Bobby:_

_Enough already, we're waiting_

_C'mon let's go_

_Everyone[speaking]:_

_We're outta control_

_Alright_

_Everybody_

_Yeah_

_C'mon_

_[Singing]:_

_School pride, let's show it_

_The champions, we know it_

_Wildcats are the best_

_Red, white, and gold_

_When it's time to win, we do it_

_We're number one, we proved it_

_Let's live it up_

_Party down_

_That's what the summer's all about_

_What time is it?_

_Roxanne:_

_Summertime is finally here_

_Everyone:_

_Let's Celebrate!_

_Max, Roxanne, Stacy, and Bobby:_

_We wanna here you loud and clear now_

_Everyone:_

_School's out_

_Max, Roxanne, Stacy, and Bobby:_

_We can sleep as late as we want to_

_Everyone:_

_It's our time_

_Max, Roxanne, Stacy, and Bobby:_

_Now we can do whatever we wanna do_

_Everyone:_

_What time is it?_

_Max, Roxanne, Stacy, and Bobby:_

_It's summertime_

_Everyone:_

_We're lovin' it_

_Max, Roxanne, Stacy, and Bobby:_

_C'mon and say it again now_

_Everyone:_

_What time is it?_

_Max, Roxanne, Stacy, and Bobby:_

_It's party time_

_Let's go and have_

_The time of our lives_

The crew just stared. The director turned to the cameraman and cleared his throat. "Let's...uh...take that out in editing..."

XXX

_'Gonna stand out_

_Above the crowd_

_Even if I gotta shout out loud'_

Max jumped over a fence onto a diving board. He jumped on it, but the diving board broke sending Max into the pool, unconscious.

The girl laying n the lounge chair nearby gasped. "Oh my God!" She dived in.

"Cut! Medic!" The director ordered.

XXX

_'Gonna stand out_

_Til you notice me.'_

Max walks to the gate in front of his house and kicks the gate, but it doesn't open. He kicks it again. It still doesn't open. Max gets frustrated. He runs across the street, then ran as fast as he could against the gate....which still doesn't open.

"Grrrr!" Max got even more frustrated. He picked up a battering ram and rammed then gate. It still didn't budge. He then rigged the gate with dynamite and chuckled evilly. He pulled the trigger causing a huge explosion. Max was covered in ash...and the gate was still intact. Max wheezed, and fell backwards in a dead faint.

The director burst out into hysterical laughter. "C-c-c-cut!"

XXX

"But Max, this isn't just my vacation." Goofy revealed. "It's a vacation with me and my best buddy."

"Oh, Mickey Mouse?" Max asked.

"...No, and that's not oyur line."

"Oh...Sora?"

"No."

"Pete?"

"No!"

"Donald Duck?"

"NO!" Goofy almost screeched.

Max stared in shock. The director cleared his throat. "'Donald Duck' was Max's correct line, Goofy..."

Goofy chuckled in embarrassment. "Whoopsie..."

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**...Um...I'll...run from the HSM haters, now... -runs like hell-**


	3. Max's Irrational Fear

Max trudges up the steps of Roxanne's house. "You get and cancel your first date in less than an hour." He rings the doorbell. "Must be some kind of lame-o record."

The door opens, and a gun is pointed at Max's head. Max gasps and throws his arms up in surrender and starts sweating.

"State your name and business." Roxanne's dad demanded,..

Max gulped. "I'm Max. I'm.." (gasp) "I'm..." (gasp) "I'm..."

"A pussy, apparently." Roxanne's dad remarked.

Max was about to retort (foolish boy...), when Roxanne appeared. "Daddy! It's okay. Max is a friend from school."

"Ok, well, I still wanna know his business."

"Get back in the house, please." Roxanne led her dad into the house, walked outside and shut the door. "Sorry about that. He's like that with all of my boyfriends."

"'Boyfriends'?" Max asked, shocked.

"Yeah." Roxanne sighed. "He was like that with my older sister, too. He's very overprotective. Some guy hurt my sister's feelings one time, and he ended up in the hospital with a full body cast."

Max just stared and gaped in shock. "OKTHANKSSEEYOUATTHEPARTYBYE!" He ran off.

"...What'd I say?" Roxanne shrugged.

XXX

"Do you wanna..." Roxanne stammered as her fingers got caught in her hair. She finally tugged her hair off her fingers. "...have a seat?"

Max chuckles nervously and helps Roxanne on the porch railing.

Members of the DCT came running in. "CENSORSHIP!"

"Now what?" The director threw his hands up.

"The boy's hands touching the girl's butt." A DCT member replied.

The director groaned and slapped his forehead. "Oh for the love of God..."

(_Take 2_)

"Speed...marker."

Max lifts Roxanne up onto the railing a little too far. Roxanne loses her balance and falls backwards over the railing and kicks Max in the mouth in the process.

"OW! OH MY GOD..." Max clutched his chin and hopped up and down.

"Cut!"

(Take 3)

"Yeah...that's sorta why I came by." Max hops onto the railing a little too far and loses his balance and falls backwards into the yard.

"NOT AGAIN!" The director yelled, throwing his head back.

Roxanne looked where Max fell. "Are you okay, Max?"

"Finland!"

XXX

"Your dad's taking you clear across the country just to see a concert?" Roxanne raised a disbelieving eyebrow.

"Yeah! See, my dad knew-knows, knows Powerline! Yeah! They used to play together. In-in a band! Haha." Max lied.

Goofy honked the horn. "COME ON, SON! LET'S GET GOING ON OUR ROAD TRIP TO LAKE DESTINY!"

Max cringed and groaned. Roxanne gasped in horror. "You dirty little liar!" She smacks Max hard across the face, and stormed inside.

Max rubbed his cheek and glared at Goofy. "I hate you so much right now..."

XXX

Max turned the radio on and plays air guitar.

"Oh, you wanna sing a song, huh?" Goofy shouted over the noise. He picked up a cassette. "Me and my dad used to sing this one all the time!" He put the cassette in the player and turned it on.

_'When you walk away, you don't hear me say_

_Please...oh baby, don't go_

_Simple and clean is the way that you made me feel tonight_

_It's hard to let it go..."_

Goofy and Max looked at each other, confused. "What the hell?"

(_Take 2_)

"Me and my dad used to sing this one all the time!" Goofy put the cassette in the player and pushed play.

_'Where you lead, I will follow_

_Anywhere, that you tell me to_

_If you need, if you need me to be with you_

_I will follow where you lead...'_

"Um...what the hell is going on?" Max asked.

"What, indeed." Goofy answered.

(_Take 3_)

Goofy puts cassette in and pushes play.

_'You've got the beeeessst of both worlds_

_You've got the shades and the hair_

_You can go anywhere-'_

Max covered his ears and screamed in horror. "TURN IT OFF! TURN IT OFF!"

(_Take 4_)

Goofy puts the cassette into the player an pushes play. The Redemption Song by Bob Marley starts playing.

"...Okay, this is getting ridiculous!" Max exclaimed.

XXX

_'On the odd romantic episode'_

"Very odd!" Max exclaimed at the weird couple.

Mickey Mouse laughed._ 'It's Californ-i-a or bust'_

"Why do I have to do all the work?" Donald grumbled.

"'Cause you're my sidekick, Donald" Mickey answered. "And this is what sidekicks do!"

Donald simmered. "Why...you...!"

Mickey notices Goofy and Max. "Hey, look! It's Goofy and Max! Maybe they can give us a ride!"

Donald's eyes widened. "Oh, hell no! Screw Goofy! We can get there on our own!"

Mickey ignores Donald and tries to wave Goofy down. "GOOFY! GOOFY! GOOOOOOFYYYYYYYY!"

Max notices Mickey yelling and running alongside the car. "Uh...Dad? " He points out of Goofy's window.

"Oh!" Goofy waves to Mickey. "Hi, Mickey!" Not watching where he was going, Goofy drove into a pole. "oops."

XXX

_'Could someone call a taxi _

_And get me out of here_

_To Beverly H-'_

Max screamed in horror as he saw Michael Jackson in the limo. "RUN! IT'S MICHAEL JACKSON!" He grabbed the steering wheel and steered the car in the opposite direction.

"What the hell, Max?" Go0ofy exclaimed. The car drove off the freeway onto the bottom street.

"...Nice, Max,." Goofy commented in a deadpan.

"Hey, I have an irrational fear of Michael Jackson!" Max defended. "I mean, can you blame me?"

Goofy sighed, irritated.


	4. Painful Interactions

**Ok, the first few bloopers are bloopers I forgot to put in the previous two chapters. Enjoy!**

_'All I got is half a chance_

_A second glance to prove_

_I got whatever it taaaaakes'_

PJ hooked a rope onto Max's belt, and signals to Bobby to pull him up.

"It's a piece of cake." Bobby pulled the rope, but instead of pulling Max up, it pulls his whole outfit off.

Max blushed scarlet, covered his front and glared offstage. "GUUUUUYS!"

Bobby and PJ doubled over, laughing. "S-s-s-sorry, Dude!"

XXX

"Ok, precious, now smi-ile!" Pete simpered.

Goofy popped up, but instead of popping up in front of the camera, he bumped into it, sending the camera flying against Pete.

"AGHH! Son of a BITCH!" Pete clutched his eye.

Goofy cringed. "Sorry, Pete."

"Dammit, don't you have any other friends to go running to after something exciting happens?" Pete snapped.

"Well, uh, I suppose there's Mickey and Donald, and Sora, but...well...y'know what? I'll just call them instead." He runs off.

"...Um...cut?"

XXX

The bell rang, and everyone ran out of the godforsaken school like they've been locked up for twenty-odd years. Max walked out in a daze.

"Way to go, man!" PJ ran and jumped up on Max's shoulders causing him to buckle to the ground.

"AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I DISLOCATEED MY SHOULDER!" Max screamed in pain.

"Sorry! I'm sorry!" PJ said hastily. "I'm so sorry. Are you okay?"

"Cut! Medic!"

XXX

_'This worse than dragon's breath and acne...'_ Max sang

"Hey, it could be hell of a lot worse, Max!" The cameraman commented.

"How?" Max shrieked.

"You could be kidnapped by rabid hillbilly scientists and be experimented on!" The cameraman exclaimed.

Max snickered. "Oh, yeah right. Like that'll ever happen..."

Suddenly, a white van rammed the car, and backed up. A hillbilly with a beard opened the door to the pacer. "We're gonna have to take the boy."

Max's eyes widened in horror. He scooted closer to Goofy and clutched his arm, hard. "Dad...do something!"

"Uhhh...huh...wh-wh-what do you need my son for?" Goofy asked, holding onto Max.

"...I...have no idea..."

"Well, then. Hot soup coming right up!" Goofy slammed on the gas and sped off.

XXX

Goofy looked at a list of things he did with his dad on road trips. "Hey, Maxie! Uh, let's play a game! You think of a person, and I'll try and guess who it is. Uh, man or woman?"

Max groaned quietly. "Oh, man..."

"Man? Ooh, that's a toughie. Uh...WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALT Disney!"

Max just stared at Goofy. "What's with the 'WAAAAAAAAAAAALT'?"

"!" A black man in his late thirties screamed out.

"Who the hell is Walt?" Max asked.

"An inside joke Lost fans have with each other." The director explained. "MOVING ON!"

XXX

Goofy sang quietly to himself while driving and reading the map at the same time. Max noticed a big semi truck speeding towards them. Alarmed, he grabbed the wheel. He was about to turn it, when then semi slammed into them head-on.

"...Well, this sucks." Max folded his arms. He and Goofy were upside-down.

"Ya know, maybe if you had a more positive attitude, bad things wouldn't happen to ya!" Goofy pointed out.

"Thanks, Yoda. I'll keep that in mind." Max said sarcastically.

XXX

"It's yodeling time!" Lester announced. The audience except Max started yodeling.

'Lester's possum Park'

The hat on one of the mechanical possums exploded off, and hit Max in the face. He fell over, unconscious, and nobody noticed.

"..."

XXX

"That's the spirit, Maxie!" Goofy exclaimed. He ran over to Max, who had just pulled a live possum out of his pants, and started spinning him around.

"Dad, no! Dad, stop! Look, this is embarrassing!" Max protested. Goofy let go, and Max flew into the crowd.

Goofy cringed. "Sorry, Max! Are you okay?"

"Uggghhh...someone please kill me." Max groaned in pain.

"I would, but I'd miss you." Goofy stated.

XXX

"It's dork and dork junior!" Cried a buck-toothed kid.

Max exploded. "THAT DOES IT!" He tackled the kid to the ground, choked him, and started punching him in the face.

"Whoa!" Goofy ran over and pulled Max off. "Ma-ax! Calm down!"

"I'LL CALM DOWN WHEN I'M DEAD!" Max shot back.

XXX

"Hey, uh, you dropped your hat." Goofy feebly gave ma his possum hat back.

Max grabbed it and growled in frustration. "This is the STUPIDEST-" He fumbled with the hat, and laughed. "I'm sorry. Can we do that again, please?

(_Take 2_)

Goofy handed Max his possum hat. "You forgot your hat."

Max stifled laughter, then let it out. "Oh my God, I'm sorry!"

XXX

Goofy backed out of his parking space and drove. He scooted low in his seat, while Max sat up higher. They continued this, which had the cameraman in stitches.

"What the hell?" The director asked, disturbed.

(AN: My sister and her friend did that one time on our way home from an amusement park.)

XXX

Goofy set the tent up and tried to hammer the pole, but hit his thumb instead.

"Ow! Okay, that hurt." Goofy winced. "Let's try this again..." He tried hitting the pole again, but hit his thumb again. He clutched his hand in pain and screamed. He aimed for the pole once again. "Okay...I'm not gonna say it. I have a kid." He took a few deep breaths and tried hitting the pole again...but hit his thumb. Goofy screamed again in pain. He stood up and hopped up and down clutching his thumb. "MOTHER! FATHER! BROTHER! SISTER!"

Max came running into the camp. "Is everything all right here, Cujo?"

Goofy was still groan8ing and moaning in pain. "Maxie! I hurt myself!"

"How?" Max asked, holding back laughter.

Goofy sniffed. "I hit my thumb with a hammer and I got a boo-boo!"

Max was finding it increasingly difficult to hold back his laughter. He cleared his throat. "Do you, ah...need some ice?"

"No...I'm dine..."

XXX

"Whoa...now that's camping!" Max exclaimed as Pete's RV unloaded.

"Did ya say something, Max?" Goofy asked, oblivious. A door opened on his head. "Ow!" He fell on his back. He looked up to see Pete appearing out of the haze., "Pete?"

"There he is!" Sora exclaimed as he ran into the campsite.

"GET 'IM!" Mickey yelled, brandishing his keyblade. They lunged for Pete, whose eyes widened in horror, and ran off.

Max just stared after Sora and Pete, and turned to Goofy. "Is Sora always like that?"

"Yeah, pretty much." Goofy answered.

XXX

"Is PJ here?" Max asked Pete.

"Who? Oh, sure. I'm sure he's loafin' around here somewhere..."

Max went inside the RV to see PJ singing while cleaning.

_'I've become so numb_

_I can't feel you there_

_Become so tired _

_So much more aware_

_I'm becoming this_

_All I want to do_

_Is to be more like me and less like you...'_

"You know, that song really describes you so well..." Max commented.

XXX

"Maximillian!" Goofy said sternly.

"What?"

"Get your gear, little man. We're going fishing." Max glared at Goofy, who stood his ground. "And I mean now!"

Max storms off. Goofy winked and gave Pete a thumbs-up. Pete returned the gesture. Goofy smiled, closed his eyes, and walked off the RV and falls on his face.

"...Owie..."

**snickers Everyone gets hurt filming, don't they? XD**


	5. Goofin' Up Builds Character

"Now, let me show you a trick that goes back about twelve or thirteen Goof generations." Goofy looked away, dreamily, then his his face fell. "...and I can't remember what the hell it's called." He burst out laughing.

XX

"..pas deux, I'm a little teapot, and the windup...!" Goofy swung the fishing line backwards. Instread of catching onto the steak, the hook catches onto Pete's shirt collar. "...and let 'er fly!" Goofy swung the line forward, taking Pete with it, screaming.

Max pointed towards the sky in surprise. "Was that Pete?"

Pete landed painfully on the other side of the lake. Bigfoot stomped up to him and growled. Pete screamed in terror, and ran across the water, and to his RV. Max and Goofy looked on in surprise.

"Wow...he runs fast for a fat man..."

XX

Goofy just hooked something heavy, and struggled with the weight. "Whoa! Quick, get the camera!"

Max turned around and tripped over something in the water. He came to the surface. "Aw, FUCK! CAN'T I GO ONE SCENE WITHOUT GETTING HURT SOMEHOW?"

"Goofin' up builds character!" Goofy insisted. "Ahyuck."

"That's it. No more fortune cookies for you."

XX

Goofy pulls up Bigfoot. "Look, Max!"

"Uhhhh duh, duh, Dad? It's BIGFOOT!"

"Could you back up a bit, Mr. Foot? You're out of focus." Goofy requested, obliviously.

Bigfoot roared...and short-circuited.

"Oooh, does this mean we can break for dinner?" Max asked eagerly.

XX

"It's locked!" Max cried, frantically.

"Quick, the sunroof!" Goofy boosted Max up, and his head hit the roof.

"DAMMIT!"

The director couldn't stop laughing. "Oh, my God..."

"Hey, that's my son you're laughing at!" Goofy stated, at Max's defense.

XXX

Max and Goofy sit quietly in the car. Bigfoot daces by in the background. Max's stomach growls. Goofy is silent.

Max looked at Goofy impatiently. "Don't you have a line?" Goofy burst out laughing, Max shakes his head in dismay.

XXX

Max reread his letter and groaned. "Oh, man. I'm dead, no matter what I do!" He folded his arms, slid down in his seat and kicked the glove department. It doesn't open. He sighed, exasperated. "Not again!" He kicked harder, and the door exploded open, and a bunch of papers flew at Max, who freaked out.

"That's IT! Somebody from above, STRIK ME NOW!"

XXX

Max and Goofy sat quietly in the car with Bigfoot dancing in the background. He lets out a long and loud fart. Goofy gagged, and plugged his nose.

"Oh my God, Max! What did you eat?" Goofy cont9inued coughing and gagging.

"Oh, some roast beef, some chicken, a pizza..." Max replied.

"I meant what was the last thing you ate."

"Some roast beef, some chicken, a pizza..."

"...I'm getting out of here." Goofy opened the door, and Bigfoot growled. Goofy's eyes widened, and he slammed the door shut. "Dammit, I'm stuck."

XXX

Goofy tried to catch a baseball at a baseball game, but falls out off the balcony, his foot caught in the banner. A baseball player signed the ball, lightly tossed it back to Goofy. Goofy catapulted back up. Max held out his arms to catch him, but Goofy falls on the bleachers behind him.

Max winced. "Oooh. That's gotta hurt..."

_(Take 2_)

A baseball player signs Goofy's ball, and lightly tosses it back to him. Goofy catapults back up to the bleachers. Max holds his arms out to catch him. Max succeeds in catching him, but falls over backwards.

"Un-freaking-believable..."

XXX

Max and Goofy check into Neptune's Inn, and go into their rooms.

"Gosh..." Goofy said, awed.

"Whoa-ho-ho. Check out the beds!" Max exclaimed. He hopped onto one of them on his back. The mattress breaks, and Max is plunged into the water. "AAAH!"

Goofy stifled his laughter, and cleared his throat. "Um...w-well, a-at least- ahem- you wouldn't have to worry about sh-showering. Ahyuck!"

Max glared at Goofy, and splashed him. "HEY!"

XXX

Pete pulled Goofy into a one-armed hug. "So, since we're all being palsy-walsy here, how bout etting me hook up the RV?"

"'Palsy-walsy'?" Max blurted out. "Where were you when we were being chased by Bigfoot? You didn't even help us!"

"Cut!"

"What?"

"That wasn't the line, Max!" The director said, annoyed.

"But it's true!" Max argued.

"I don't care! Get your line right!"

XXX

"I can't believe you, man." PJ said, astonished. He picked up a slice of pizza. "Whatever made you think your dad would fall for a stupid idea like that?"

Max smiled and picked up a slice of pizza. He froze. "Ah...dammit. What's my line?"

"'It wasn't stupid'!" A producer shouted out.

"Oh! Oh, yeah. Right."

XXX

Goofy walked forlornly into the motel room.

"Hey, Dad." Max greeted.

Goofy ignored his son, and disilliousinally started walking to his bed. Then, he burst out laughing.

"I'm sorry! Sorry. Sorry./"

XXX

"Uh...how 'bout a song, Dad?" Max nervously suggested.

Goofy didn't respond. Instead, he tried to keep up his angry face, but burst out laughing instead. "Sorry! Sorry, sorry, sorry! I'm not used to being angry for while. Ahyuck!"

XXX


	6. Goofy Reveals His Violent Side

**Sorry for the wait, guys! I almost didn't update today. My laptop stopped working, and my dad tried for six hours to come up with a solution, and his solution was to enter in safe mode, which is weird for me. The pages and words are all stretched out, and I don't have audio. _ Oh well. Beggers can't be choosers. It's better than nothing, anyway.**

"Uh...how 'bout a song, Dad?" Max asked, nervously. Goofy said nothing, and got angrier. "A game? A game! Yeah. Ok, man or woman?" Goofy still said nothing. Instead, his frown deepened. "Man? Ok. Uh, Walt Disney!"

"WAAAAAAAAALT!" The same man from an earlier chapter screamed.

Goofy pulled over and completely lost his temper. "OH, THAT'S IT!" He whipped out a machine gun and aimed it at the offending citizen.

!

Max cringed in surprise. "Geez!"

XXX

Max walked up to Goofy, who was standing at the ridge. "Dad, listen, about my directions..." Goofy folded his arms and turned away. "Will you listen to me? I gotta tell you something, Dad."

"Why bother? I'm probably too stupid to understand anyway, right?" Goofy snapped.

Max scowled at him. "You JUST realized that? Would you like me to give you examples of just how stupid, naive, gullible, and retarded you are?"

Goofy whirled around and glared at Max. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me!" Max pointed an accusing finger at his father. "All those years whoring yourself to Pete when he cons and manipulat4es you every time, all those times I explicitly told you I wasn't having a good time on this godforsaken road trip- how do you live with yourself?"

"Are you saying I'm a bad person?"

"No. I'm saying you're a retarded person who doesn't know how to pay attention!" Max retorted.

Goofy got even angrier. He gritted his teeth, balled his fist, and raised and reared it back. Max gasped and put his arms up in front of his face. However, instead of hitting Max, Goofy punched himself in the face. Max put his arms down and was slightly shocked and amused to see his dad beating himself up.

"You wanna piece of me?" Goofy punched himself to the ground, held his head and banged it against the floor. "Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!" He swung-kicked himself, then pulled himself up by grabbing his ears, then slammed against the car.

"Dad! What are you doing?" Max asked, slightly worried.

"I'm, kicking my ass! DO YA MIND?" Goofy snapped. He kicked himself in the shin, then stomped his foot. "AAAH!" He then popped the hood open and slammed it on his head and squished it.

Max gasped and started running. "HELP! MY DAD'S GONE STARK RAVING MAD!"

XXX

Max angrily walked to the car, kicked a tire and leaned against it. It didn't move, so he nudged it a little., He groaned in exasperation. "Why do inanimate objects hate me so much?" He kicked the car hard, then hopped up and down, clutching his foot in pain. "AAAAH! AAAAH!"

The director held his head in his hand. "The things I do for money..."

XXX

Max Is floating away from Goofy towards the waterfall. The car flipped over and Max is slammed against a rock, unconscious.

"Gawrsh! He's turnin' into an even bigger accident prone than I am!" Goofy exclaimed.

XXX

Max is hanging over the waterfall. He gasped in horror, and screams as he falls over it. However, he wasn't wearing his parachute. "AAAAAH! I QUIIIIIT!"

XXX

Max floats up by the tarp. He sees Goofy hurtling towards the edge. "Dad!" He held his arms out to catch the fishing pole. Goofy swung the pole for Max to catch, but it hooks onto his sweatshirt, and pulls him down.

"Whoa! I BETTER GET A RAISE!" Max screamed at the director.

_(Take 2)_

Goofy swung the pole out to Max, but he doesn't catch it. Goofy then falls down the waterfall.

"Oooh. That's gonna hurt in the morning..."

XXX

"I'm as little teapot, let 'er fly!" Max swung the pole down in hopes f catching Goofy. He waited awhile, but Goofy still didn't catch it. "Uh...guys? How long was I supposed to wait?"

"He should've caught it by now..." The director said. They waited a few more minutes. "Oh, my God! SOMERBODY GET A MEDIC AND SEARCH RFOR GOOFY!"

"Dad? DAD!" Max screamed worriedly. "DAD!"

"Found him!" A medic called out. "He's all right."

Max sighed and laughed with relief.

XXX

Max laughed with relief as he saw Goofy being pulled up by him. He reeled faster. Goofy looked touched and happy to see that Max saved him/.

"The Perfect Cast." They stretch their arms out to hug each other, but Max loses his grip on the fishing pole, and Goofy falls ye again,. "MAAAAAX!"

"Sorry!" Max cringed.

"Way to ruin the moment!" The director rolled his eyes. "Cut!"

XXX

An equipment guy throws the instruments in a storage room. Max peeks out of a drum case. When the coast was clear, he got out. "Dad." He whispered.

Goofy tries to break out of the guitar case, but it won't open. "It won't open!" He tried harder, and the case toppled over. It still wouldn't open. "Guys! I'm stuck!"

Max laughed as he tried to crack the case open. "What is it with props getting jammed and hard to open?"

"GET ME OUTTA HERE! I'M STARTING TO SUFFOCATE!"

Max cringed. "Nice lungs..."

XXX

PJ was cleaning while watching the Powerline concert. He beamed when he saw Max on TV. "He did it!"

Pete walked towards the TV while drinking beer, but slipped and fell.

"It's official." Pete said in a deadpan. "I've become Goof."

(_Take 2_)

"He did it!" PJ exclaimed at the TV. Pete did a spittake when he saw the Goofs on TV at the concert. "Well, that's one way to defeat a villain!"

XXX

Goofy hummed "On The Open Road" while putting the bumper of the car back on. He smiled sheepishly at Max and Roxanne and pointed to the car with his thumb. Nothing happened. Goofy stared at the cart, then at the creators.

"Where's the kaboom? Here was supposed to be an earth-shattering kaboom!" As soon as Goofy said that, the car exploded, sending him up in the air, then through Roxanne's porch roof.

(_Take 2_)

The car exploded, sending Goofy int the air. "YAAAAAH-HOO-HOO-HOOEY!" Goofy crashed all the way through the roof and onto the porch. "I'm okay." They hear a bone cracking. "Ow. Oh, I know I twisted something..."

xxx

The camera goes up as music plays. All of a suden, there qwas a record scratch and the camera zoomed back down to Max.

"HEY,. WAIT A MINUTE!" Max shouted angrily. "Most of the Disney guys have a damsel in distress! I didn't have a damn damsel in distress! What the hell?"

"Why is that a big deal?" The director asked.

"Yeah! You're not even supposed to exist!" The cameraman shouted,.

Max just stared at the cameraman in shock. "I...I don't...exist?"

Goofy glared at the cameraman. "Nice work." He said sarcastically. He turned to Max. :"Of course you exist! You're living, breathing, walking. You exist as much as I do!"

Max just shook his head. "I...don't believe this..."

"Don't pay attention to that camera whore-"

"He-ey!" The cameraman glared at Goofy.

XXX

"Aaand cut! That's a wrap, people!" The director shouted. He turned to the cameraman. "Did you get all that?"

"Sure did!" The cameraman replied happily.

The director noticed the camera lens. "Why is the camera lens still on the camera?"

"I didn't want to lose it, so I didn't take it off!"

The director's eyes widened. "You mean it's been on the wholer time?"

The cameraman nodded. "Yep!"

The director screamed and ran atround, going insane.

"This is gonna take a while..." Max said to Roxanne and Goofy.

**Well, what do you think? Up next are deleted and extended scenes.**


	7. AGM Deleted Scenes and Alternate Endings

**All righty! Here are the A Goofy Movie deleted scenes! Um...yeah. XD Anyway...**

_**Scene #1: The Great Bigfoot Escape**_

Max stretched and ytawned. He felt sore after sleeping in a weird position in the car. The first rays of sunlight were peeking over the horizon.

"Ugh...okay, that was the worst nights' sleep I ever had." Max complained.

Goofy woke up, stretched, and yawned. "Best nights' sleep I ever had, ahyuck! How'd you sleep, Maxie?"

"Fine." Max sighed. "Dad, how are we going to get out of this? We can't be trapped by Bigfoot forever!"

Goofy stroked his chin in thought. "Hmmm. Well...gawrsh, I dunno. Any ideas?"

Max rolled his eyes and looked out the window. The leaves on a distant tree distracted him from his thoughts as they took the form of Roxanne's head.

...Wait a minute...Max's eyes widen3d as he thought up an idea. "That's it!"

"What's it?"

"Dad, we're gonna distract Bigfoot! Okay...you distract him and drive him away from us, while I get the car keys!" Max exclaimed.

Goofy was hesitant. "Ooh...I duuno, Max. That sounds risky."

"Trust me: I've faced tougher problems than this." Max assured him. "Now, roll your window down so I can throw the keys to you as I run back to the car. The plan is genius!" He chuckled evilly. Then stopped. Goofy blinked at him, weirdly. "I have no idea where that came from..."

"...Okqay. Be careful." Goofy cautioned. He rolled down his window.

Max slowly opened his door and got out. He glanced nervously up at the still sleeping Bigfoot and shut his door. That woke Bigfoot up. He stuttered and growled. He gave Max the evil eye. The teen dog gasped and ran to the pile of debris. Bigfoot chased him, but stopped when he hears the horn honking. Goofy smirked at him and continued honking the horn, driving Bigfoot away from Max, who continued frantically looking for the keys. The sun rose higher and sparkled off of the car key. Max chuckled and ran to pick it up.

"Ahahaha! I struck gold!" Max exclaimed. He ran back to the car, but was confronted by Bigfoot. "AAAH!" He sprinted towards the forest. "DAAAD! A LITTLE HELP?"

"All right, all right." Goofy jumped pout of the car and ran towards the two. He picked up a stick and ran to Bigfoot. "Heeeeerre's Goofy!" He jumped up and smacked Bigfoot over the head. He didn't budge. Instead, Bigfoot turned around and growled at him. Goofy started sweating. "I...I-I thought you'd fall down."

Goofy ran screaming as Bigfoot chased him. He almost ran into a tree, but Max pulled him away in time. Bigfoot, however, wasn't so lucky. He slammed into the tree, and fell back unconscious.

"...Whew." Max said, relieved. "All right. Let's get out of here before anything else happens."

XXX

_**Scene #2: The Back of Your Hand**_

Pete got into the hot tub with Goofy, and water spilled out due to his size. "You know, they're always putting too much water in these things." Goofy just smiled at Pete. Pete sat down and folded his hands over his bulging belly. "You know what I like about you, Goof? You got the patience of a saint."

"Thanks. Um...how do you mean?" Goofy asked.

"I've seen the way your kid talks to you. Thinks he can do whatever the hell he wants." Pete shrugged. "If that were my kid, I'd have shown him the back of my hand ages ago. Hell of a lot cheaper than a shrink."

Goofy raised an eyebrow at Pete. "Is that what you do to PJ? Show him the back of your hand?"

"I never got a chance to." Pete shrugged. "Peg told me if I ever hit our kids, then she'd make my life a living hell."

"Hmmm." Goofy didn't know what to say to that.

"So, uh, you and your son seem to be getting along just hunky-dory, huh?" Pete smiled.

"Yeah. It's been great!" Goofy said happily.

XXX

_**Scene #3: So... Good Talk**_

Goofy kissed the back of his son's head. Max rubbed it, disgusted. "Aw, Dad!"

"Oh, you love me and you know it!" Goofy exclaimed. He chuckled. He sighed and sobered up. "How'd everything start, anyway? I mean...what did you do that made your principal so mad?"

Max sighed. It was about time his father listened. He meant really listened. "Well...it all started when I first started my freshman year. There's this girl- Roxanne- she...well, let's say she stole my heart. She's so smart and pretty, and...just...downright amazing. But...she hardly noticed me, you know? So, PJ, me, and our friend Bobby sort of...hijacked the end of school assembly so I could dance and sing as Powerline to get Roxanne's attention."

"Your principal told me you dressed up like a gang member and caused a riot." Goofy shrugged. "That doesn't sound like you."

Max rolled his eyes. "The principal is a freaking douchebag. He exaggerates everything. One time someone was caught making out with his girlfriend, and the principal suspended him for fornicating in the hallway."

Goofy sighed and shook his head in dismay. "I guess I take things too seriously."

"Yeah, I'd say you do." Max said. He shook his head. "Well...remember when I stopped at someone's house on the way out of town?"

"Yeah."

"That was Roxanne." He smiled. "She's hot, isn't she?"

Goofy chuckled. "Well, sure, for a teenager."

Max laughed. "Anyway, I asked her out to a party her friend was hosting, but, that plan got shot to sunshine when you forced me to go on this road trip."

"Sorry..."

"Ah, it's okay." Max waved him off. "When I told her I couldn't go to the party, she was bummed. She was thinking of asking someone else, and I just...I panicked. So, I told her you were taking me to the Powerline concert in LA, and that you knew Powerline, because you used to play together in a band."

"But I don't know Powerline." Goofy was still confused. "And we didn't play together in a band."

"I know. I lied to her." Max said guiltily. "That's why I changed the map. I wanted to keep my promise to her that I'd dance onstage with Powerline and wave to her as we finish the final number." He sighed. "Can you ever forgive me? I'm really sorry. I know how important this was to you..."

"Oh, Maxie. I just want you to be happy." Goofy hugged him.

Max hugged his dad back. They pulled away. "Anyway, I figured she'll never want to see me again. Much less go out with me. What a dumb lie, huh?"

XXX

_**Scene #4: Epic Wave**_

As Powerline finished his final number, lights flashed, and the audience cheered. The camera landed on Max. He bowed and smiled. He waved to the camera.

At Stacy's party, Roxanne watched the whole thing. She beamed wildly as Max waved to her.

Stacy squealed in excitement. "OHMYGOD! Roxanne, he's waving to you!"

"I know!" Roxanne giggled.

XXX

_**Scene #5: Aftermath**_

Max and Goofy bowed and waved to the camera. They snuck off quickly, but were stopped by a security guard. "Hold it, you two."

_'Aw, crap!_' Max thought. He got even more nervous as Powerline stormed towards them, looking stern.

"You two have holy hell to answer for." Powerline told them. "You trespassed, and you crashed a concert without permission, you almost ruined my career! What inspired you to do that?"

"I'm sorry, Mr...uh...Powrerline. It was my idea..." Goofy tried explaining.

Max put a hand on his shoulder. "Dad, it's okay." He turned to Powerline. "I did this because I wanted to impress a girl." He explained everything. How he hijacked his end of school assembly, how he asked Roxanne to the party, but it changed when his dad forced him on a road trip, how he lied to her about his dad knowing Powerline, how he changed the map...

"So, let me get this straight..." Powerline started pacing. "You practically rearrange the whole damn solar system to impress a girl."

"Well, he didn't rearrange the solar sstem-"

"It's a metaphor, Dad." Max said. "And yes, I did, basically."

Powerline just sighed and shook his head and sat down. "I had a thing for a girl, once. She hardly knew I existed. So I went out of my way and above the law to impress her. But you know what? I didn't have to do all those things. She already was impressed by me. All I had to do was tell her the truth about how I really felt." Max smiled, bowed his head, and closed his eyes. "Your girl...is she that important to you?"

"More than anything." Max clasped his hands in front of him. Goofy cleared his throat, folded his arms, and glared at Max. Max gasped, glanced at Goofy, then smiled sheepishly. "Besides my dad, anyway. Hehe."

"Then go get her." Powerline advised. He walked over to Max and put his hands on his shoulders. "Tell her the truth about how you really feel."

Max smiled up at his idol. "Thanks, Powerline. And I'm sorry we crashed your concert and ruined your career."

"Ah, don't worry about it." Powerline smiled. Then he got serious. "Just don't let it happen again."

"I promise!"

XXX

_**Alternate Ending #1:**_

"...let 'er fly!" Max swung the fishing pole down. He waited for a few minutes, then realized he might be too late. He waited a few more minutes, then got really worried. "Dad?" He yelled. No response. He started breathing heavily. _'No...oh, God, no...'_ He loosened up the tarp, which allowed him to float down. He looked around frantically. He finally got free of the tarp and dived into the river. He surfaced and looked around. "Dad!" He continued looking in all directions before he saw his lifeless father washed up on shore. Heart racing, Max swam as fast as he could to Goofy. "Dad!" Max pulled him out of the water and collapsed on his knees. He checked for breathing. Max started hyperventilating. "No...no, no, no, no. Please!" He started doing CPR on Goofy. "Come on, Dad. Don't leave me." He did several more compressions. "Don't you leave me!" He started crying as he did several more failed compressions. He started pounding on Goofy's chest. "Come on! Come on!" He sobbed. "Come on, you son of a bitch!" He continued trying to revive his father until the sun set completely. He sobbed harder and tried CPR one more time. No luck. Max broke down completely and hugged his lifeless father. He cried himself to sleep.

The next morning, Max woke up with a heavby heart. He picked up his father's lifeless body and trudged along the river looking for their car. He then felt Goofy twitch. Max gasped and set him down. "Dad?"

Goofy opened his eyes and groaned. He sat up and clutched his head. "What happened last night?"

Max gasped happily and started crying and laughing in relief. He hugged Goofy tightly."I thought I lost you."

Goofy hugged him back. "Oh, Maxie. You'll never lose me."

Max snifdfed. "I love you."

"I love you, too." Goofy said. "More than anything."

XXX

_**Alternate ending #2:**_

"So, you wanna do something tonight?" Rxanne asked.

"Absolutely!" Max said. Then hree remembered something. "Oh, n0o. I can't."

Roxanne folded her arms distrustfully. "What?"

"I'm kind of doing something with my dad." Roxanne raised an eyebrow. "Honest! How 'bout tomorrow?"

Roxanne smiled, closed her eyes, and extended her hand. "Deal."

Max pecked her on the lips. They both laughed and stared at each other lovingly. They heard a clatter and looked at Goofy humming and putting the bumper back on the car. He smiled sheepishly and gestured to it with his thumb.

BOOM!

Max and Roxanne blinked in shock. "...Ok, it looks like I'm free tonight." Max said simply.

Roxanne stared at Max in shock. "You can't be serious."

Max shrugged. "What?"

"He is your father! He could be dead or dying!" Roxanne shrieked.

"Roxanne, you don't know my father." Max folded his arms and smiled. "He has the uncanny ability to survive everything he faces!"

"MAX, HE IS LAYING OUT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET WITH A FLAMING DOOR ON TOP OF HIM!"

"Oh..." Max realized what was happening. "DAD!" He sprinted to his father and threw the door off of him. He checked for a pulse and turned back to Roxanne. "CALL AN AMBULENCE!"

XX

**END! XD**

**Yeah...I just wanted to get this up. There's still more chapters, though. Next up is a behind-the-scenes look!**

**...and yes, Ingot the idea for the second alternate ending from YouTube. -runs-**


	8. Of Pranks and Tacos

**All right! Here we go with the backstage stuff!**

Goofy walked into Max's dressing room eating a taco. "Hey, Max, do you have any hot sauce?"

"No." Max answered, not looking up from his comic book.

"Oh." He paused. "Hey, can I use your bathroom?"

"Sure."

"Thanks." Goofy set the taco down on the table and headed for the bathroom.

Max looked at the taco longingly. He was hungry, and he hadn't eaten a taco for a long time. It looked warm, juicy, and crunchy. He slowly walked over to it. _'I'm sure he won't mind if I just took a bite.' _He thought. He took a bite. _'Oh, God, that tastes so good...'_ He took another bite, and then another until it was all gone. He licked his fingers and his lips clean, then went back to his comic book.

Goofy came out of the bathroom and went to the table. He gasped. "Where's my taco?"

Max froze. _'Aw, dammit!"_

"Max, have you seen my taco?" Goofy asked.

"Uh...no." Max lied easily. He burped, and covered his mouth.

Goofy slowly turned towards Max. He gaped at him, then frowned. "You."

"What?" Max asked innocently.

"You stole my taco!" Goofy exclaimed. "And then you ate it!"

Max started sweating. "Uh...heh..." He stood up and started running towards the door.

"Hey! GET BACK HERE!" Goofy chased after Max "YOU OWE ME A TACO!"

XXX

"Dude...I'm so freaking bored. Bobby complained.

"Hmmm...wanna play a game?" PJ asked

"Sure!"

PJ stood up. "All right. There are some games in the closet."

PJ walked to the closet, opened it and gasped as he saw Max and Roxanne making out.

Max glared at PJ and grabbed the handle. "Do you mind?" He slammed the door shut.

PJ walked zombielike back to Bobby "Maybe we should go somewhere else..."

XXX

One morning, Max dreamt he was floating on water. He felt the sun on his face, and the wind blowing through his hair. He stretched and felt something poking his face. Opening his eyes, he gasped in shock as he saw a bird looking down at him. He yelped and shot up. Looking around, he realized he was out in the middle of the lake on his mattress!

"Holy..." He looked towards the shore, where PJ and Boby were laughing hysterically. He growled at them angrily. _'Ohhh...those bastards. They'll get what's coming to them...'_

XX

Bobby stared lazily out his window. He sighed as he admired the brightly, cloudless sky, the rtich, green grass and trees...

Suddenly, a werewolf popped up in front of his window and made growling sounds. Bobby screamed in fright and fell over.

Max sank deep in the bushes and laughed to himself. He heard someone coming and sat still.

PJ skated up towards Bobby's house. Max shook the bushes to get his attention. PJ walked over inquiringly. Max shook the bushes one more time. When PJ got close, he shot out of the bushes and roared.

PJ screamed in fright and ran inside Bobby's house. "DUDE! There's a werewolf outside!"

"I KNOW!" Bobby exclaimed. "It was scary..."

PJ's cell phone rang. "Hello?"

"PJ! It's Max." Max said frantically. "Dude, there's a werewolf chasing me! AAH! IT GOT ME! OH, GOD!"

PJ's eyes widened. He dashed out on his skateboard followed by Bobby. "WE'RE COMING, MAX!"

PJ and Bobby dashed to Max's house where they saw Max sprawled over his porch steps lifeless and bloody.

Bobby gasped. "We're too late!"

"Max!" PJ exclaimed. He ran over and picked up his friend's body. He sniffed. "Buddy." He sobbed into Max's chest. Bobby helped PJ carry Max inside and lay him on the couch. They slowly trudged back outside and sat on the porch.

"What are we gonna tell Mr. G?" PJ asked sadly. "_How_ are we gonna tell him?"

As if on cue, Goofy drove up. "Hey, fellers! Why the long faces?"

PJ swallowed and stood up. "Mr. G...you better come inside. There's something you should see."

Goofy followed the two boys inside. PJ gasped as hje saw Max sitting on the couch with his feet on the coffee table and one arm behind his head and one hand on the remote. He looked over at his dad and friends.

"Oh, hey, guys! What's up?"

PJ stared in shock and horror. "I-but-you-blood! And...werewolves!"

Max faked confusion. "What are you talking about, Peej?"

PJ stared dumbly. Then his eyes fell on a werewolf mask. Realization dawned on PJ...

"You tricked us..." PJ Glared at Max and clenched his fists.

"Well, that's what you get for pushing out in the middle of the lake!" Max replied. He closed his eyes, smirked and folded his arms.

WHAM!

PJ punched Max hard in the faced. "Don't you ever do that to me again! EVER!"

"It was a joke!" Max shot back, clutching his eye.

PJ closed his eyes, turned his hell, and slammed the door behind him.

"...You know, you probably shouldn't fake your death as a prank." Bobby commented.


	9. Max Has A Nobody And A Heartless

**All righty. I'm gonna have a lot of fun writing these bloopers! There's gonna be a few song parodies as well as scene parodies from various Disney films, Mean Girls, and South Park.**

* * *

Enjoy!

Goofy tries to tape one corner of the banner above the doors. It falls, so Goofy holds up the banner with one foot, while balancing the other on the chair in order to reach the roll of tape which fell on the far corner of the picnic table. The chair toppled over, sending Goofy and the banner flying.

Goofy laughed along with the camera crew. "Okay, let's try that again..."

XXX

"You guys realize that going off to college means no more- well meaning-, but- totally smothering, overprotective, doting, 'ah-yuck'-ing dad?" Max said with disdain.

"I thought you guys grew close last movie." PJ pointed out. "What happened?"

Max shrugged. "I don't know. Crappy writing and a different director?"

"True."

XXX

Goofy walked over to Max and put a hand on his shoulder. "Now, look, son. That there X-Games fiddle-faddle may be all well and fun...but remember: you're going to college to make something of yourself."

"Exactly." Max smirked. He jumped forwards, causing Goofy to reel backwards.

_Max_

_I'm gonna be the X-Games king_

_Enemies beware!_

_Goofy_

_Well, I've never seen an X-Games king_

_With quite so little care_

_Max_

_I'm gonna be the main event_

_Like no king before_

_I'm practicing my skateboarding_

_I'm working on my ROAR!_

Max roared in Goofy's face, causing Goofy to fall backwards into a bowl of potato salad. He grabbed a towel, which happened to be Pete's shirt.

_Goofy_

_Thus far, a rather uninspiring thing_

Pete angrily throws Goofy across the yard.

_Max_

_Oh, I just can't wait to be king!_

_Goofy_

_You have a long way to go now, Maxie_

_If you think-_

_Max_

_No one sayin' "Do this"_

_Goofy _

_Now when I said that, I-_

_PJ_

_No 0one saying "Be there"_

_Goofy_

_What you don't realize-_

_Max_

_No one saying "Stop that"_

_Max & PJ_

_No one saying "See here!"_

_Goofy_

_Now see here!_

_Max_

_Free to skate around all day!_

_Goofy_

_Well, that's definately out_

_Max_

_Free to do it all my way_

_Goofy (As he's running alongside Max)_

_I think it's time that you and I_

_Arranged a heart-to-heart_

_(Slams into a tree)_

_Max (Leans over Goofy)_

_I don't need advice from klutzy goofballs for a start_

_Goofy_

_Well if this is where the school is headed, count me out!_

_Out of service, out of Spoonerville, I wouldn't hang about!_

_(Trips over a tree root) AAH!_

_This child is getting wildly out of wing_

_Max_

_Oh, I just can't wait to be king_

The boys skated around the yard. Goofy looked around, helplessly.

_Max_

_Everybody look left_

_Everybody look right_

_Everywhere you look, I'm_

_Standing in the spotlight_

_Goofy_

_Not...yet!_

_Bobby & PJ_

_Let every athlete go for broke and sing_

_Let';s hear it on the campus and the wing_

_It's gonna be King Max's finest fling_

_Oh, he just can't wait to be king_

_Max, PJ, & Bobby_

_Oh, I just can't wait to be king_

_Oh, I just can't wait to be king_

_Oh, I just can't waaaaaaaaiiiiit...to be king!_

The director just stared. "...um...awesome?"

XXX

Goofy twirled the horseshoe on his finger. It slipped, and knocked Pete to the ground. Goofy cringed, while everybody else laughed. "Sorry, Pete!"

XXX

Bobby turned to PJ. "Hey, dude, don't you have a mom and sister?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Then how come they're not in n either of these films?" Bobby inquired.

"My parents divorced when I was in seventh grade, and my sister went to live with our mom." PJ replied.

"Okay...what about Max's mom?" Bobby asked.

"Died when Max was a little kid." PJ answered.

"Oh..." Bobby said. He paused, then... "Hey, how come Roxanne and Stacy aren't in this film?"

"I don't know, dude." PJ said. "Crappy writing and different director?"

"Oh, yeah."

XXX

Max stretched and yawned on his bed. "Oh, listen, I'[m gonna turn in." He told Goofy. He took his shirt off, revealing a black tank top with a Heartless symbol on it. Goofy gasps in horror, and Mac covers it. "Uhhh...I can explain."

All of a sudden, the door slammed open, and Sora came barging in, followed by Donald, Mickey, and Riku. All of them were brandishing their weapons.

"HEARTLESS!" Sora yelled.

"GET 'IM!" Mickey yelled.

Max's eyes widened in horror, and he sprinted out the window. Sora, Donald, Mickey, and Riku followed suit, leaving Goofy looking bewildered.

"Gawrsh..." Goofy said. He turned around to see a man dressed all in white with platinum blonde hair with a striking resemblance to Max standing in the doorway.

"'Sup.?" The man said morosely.

Goofy stared at the stranger. "Maxie?"

"Nope. Liam." The man corrected. He folded his arms and leaned against the door frame. "I'm Max's Nobody."

Goofy's blood ran cold, and he felt his stomach drop. "But...what happened to Maxie?"

"His girlfriend dumped him last year." Liam explained. "Anger, hurt, and pain made him into a Heartless."

Goofy felt his legs turn to jelly. "But...who...how...?" Goofy stumbled outside, walked to the middle of the street, fell to his knees, closed his eyes, bent his head back, and raised his fists to the heavens.

"NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

And that, my friends, is why Max is so different in this movie! XD

XXX

Goofy sung a happy tune while making a humungous breakfast for Max, who skated into the kitchen. Goofy lifted his leg to let Max skateboard under it, but Max slammed into it, sending the Goofs flying.

"...I told you it was a bad idea to skateboard in the house."

"Fuck off, Dad!"

"Max! Language!" The director scolded.

XXX

"Don't forget to have some milk with those...donuts!" Goofy called after Max, as he drove away with his friends. He sighed. "Good-bye, my little college man."

"You know, you look kind of girly there." The cameraman commented.

Goofy glared at the cameraman. "Excuse me?" He pushed up his sleeves threateningly.

The cameraman gulped. "Um...I, uh...I mean..."

"Run, cameraman, run." The director said half-jokingly.

* * *

"Thanks." The cameraman sprinted off with Goofy in hot pursuit.

**Hahahaha...REVIEW!**


	10. Of Food Spills And Dance Orgies

Max, Bobby, and PJ are driving towards the college. All three of them were looking at the map.

"Hey Bob, um, who's driving?" Asked Max They looked up from the map and scream as they saw a semi truck heading straight for them. They grab the wheel and try to steer away, but crash into the semi. "..Ok, that is it! Why is it that every single one of my appearances involve me running into or almost getting run over by semis? I'm sick of it!"

"Bad luck?" PJ suggested.

XX

At work, Goofy pushes the reverse button out of panic. The machine goes out of control, and Goofy gets sucked through pipes and into the main machine. It doesn't explode.

The director sighed. "Cut..."

XX

Max, PJ, and Bobby skateboard through campus. Two male students carrying a couch with a third male student laying on it cross Max's path. They stop and look up in confusion. Max crashes into the couch, causing it to fall over backwards.

The director slapped his forehead. "Cut!"

_(Take 2)_

Max tries jumping over the couch, but trips over the headrest and falls.

"OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!"

XX

"Don;'t you dare waste my time, 'cause life can stop..." Beret Girl (Let's call her BG) turned on a flashlight and flips a coin. "...on a dime."

PJ stares in awe. The dime flips towards him, but PJ didn't catch it. PJ chuckled nervously.

"All right, let's do that again..."

XX

"I'm gonna go give him a Gamma welcome." Bradley smiled, handed his helmet to Tank, and walked over to Max, who is getting coffee. They bump into each other. Coffee accidentally spills all over Brad's sweater. Brad is pissed. "Why...you..." He pushes his sleeves up.

"Cut!" The director shouted. "That's not your line!"

"I DON'T FUCKING CARE!" Brad screamed angrily. "DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THIS SWEATER COSTS?"

"Dude!" Max exclaimed, shocked. Brad glares at him. Max gulps nervously,. "I'll...pay for the dry cleaning..."

_(Take 2)_

Max bumps into Brad, spilling coffee. But instead of landing on his sweater, it lands on his crotch.

Max winced. "Aw, crap..."

Bradley screams in pain and clutches his crotch. "OH MY GOD, IT BURNS!"

Everybody laughed at Bradley's crying and writhing.

_(Take 3)_

Max bumps into Bradley, but instead of the coffee spilling on Bradley, it spills on Max.

"AWWW! GODDAMMIT!" Max yelled in pain.

"HA! Now you know how I feel!" Bradley taunted.

XXX

"Bradley." Bradley introduced himself to Max without shaking his hand. "Bradley Uppercrust III." Behind him, Tank clears his throat. "Oh yeah, and my right-hand man, Gamma boyfr-" Bradley looked horrified for a split second then composed himself. "I MEAN BROTHER...Tank."

Max blinked at Bradley. "Were you about to say 'boyfriend'?"

"Of course not!" Bradley snapped. "It was a slip of the tongue!"

Max shrugged, not buying it. "Okay..."

"IT WAS!" Bradley shrieked, his left eye twitching.

Max backed away slowly. "Okay. Geez..."

XXX

"Oh. Sorry, but PJ, Bobby, and I are a team." Max said soberly. "It's all of us or none of me."

Bradley aims a gun at Max's head and speaks in a demonic voice. "Join us or die!"

Max stared at Bradley in shock and horror. "What the hell, man?"

"Bradley, get your goddamn line right!" The director ordered.

"...But...can I still kill Max?" Asked Bradley.

"No! I don't want to chance his dad becoming a terrorist against Gammas!" The director shouted back.

Bradley looked at Max. "Is he exaggerating?"

Max shook his head. "I don't think so, dude."

XXX

"The only thing you three could win is a faggot contest, FAGS!" Tank commented. The Gammas laughed.

The director stared in shock and blinked. "Oy vey..."

XXX

Bradley leans against Max with his elbow on Max's shoulder. "All right, quit playing with my emotions." Bradley then burst out laughing, and leans against Max, who laughs with him.

XX

"I'm giving you the opportunity to join the Gamma Mu Mu Fraternity!" Bradley exclaimed.

PJ crowded around. "Moo, moo! Who wants to join a bunch of fags?"

The director sighed. "This is gonna be a long day..."

XXX

"Oooh, passion!" Bradley exclaimed sarcastically. "I like your style, Little Miss Moccachino, but I'm a little busy right now."

"Well, I'm dizzy right now from your lame-ass comebacks." BG retorted.

"Oooohhhhh!" Max, PJ, and Bobby chorused.

XXX

Bradley chuckles dryly. "Uh...why don't you go off and save some whales or something?"

BG glares at Bradley. She snaps her fingers in front of his face, and accidentally hits him. She gasps. "Oh! Oooh. Sorry about that. Are you okay?"

Everyone except Bradley laughed. Bradley clutched his nose. "You suck..."

XXX

Everyone snaps their fingers and glare at Bradley until he explodes. "KNOCK IT OFF!" Everyone stops snapping. Max smirks and snaps his fingers twice in Bradley's face and bursts out laughing.

"Du-hude. Sweet!" PJ laughed.

Bradley pushed up his sleeves and gritted his teeth angrily. "You're dead meat."

Max stares at Bradley...then slaps him across the face. Bradley runs out of the cafe crying hysterically.

"...That was random." Bobby commented.

XXX

Bradley and Max shake hands. "Get ready to wipe the dirt off my shoes..." He pulls Max's hand towards him, but pulls a little harder than he meant to. Max slams into him and they both laugh.

XXX

Tank shoots spitballs at Max. Max turns around angrily.

"Spitballs? Seriously?" He whispered angrily. "What are you, in high school?"

XXX

"A year?" PJ said frantically. "Did he say a year? I heard a year, man, I heard a year." He whimpered. "Hold me and tell me he didn't say a year!"

Bobby walked over to PJ and held him. "He didn't say a year."

PJ and Max stared at Bobby. "...Dude."

"Awkward?"

"Yeah." PJ gently pushed Bobby off.

XXX

"He's got his life, I've got my life." Max gestured to himself. "My life" echoed a few times.

The trio were quiet for a few minutes until PJ spoke. "What if..._you are_ his life?"

_Inception_ music starts playing until Max frowns. "Oh, dear God, I hope not!"

XXX

Goofy gets breakfast and somehow manages to slide onto a chair. He trips over it sending food flying, causing everyone to laugh.

(_Take 2_)

Goofy slides on the chair to Max's table, slides the tray towards Max a little too far. Food spills all over Max.

"...Fuck my life..."

XXX

Max and Goofy are studying at the library. Max nearly falls asleep when a paper plane hits him. He reads it. It says "Meet us in the Music Appreciation aisle. 911!"

"...You know, I'm sensing some major foreshadowing here..." Max said aloud.

XXX

Max clears his throat to get the librarians' attention. Sylvia looks up from her work and smiles.

"Good evening, gentlemen-oh." She snickers and laughs. "That wasn't right, was it?"

(_Take 2_)

"...I am the head librarian versed in all assets..." Sylvia laughed. "Sorry!"

"Cut! Let's do that again!" The director said. He sighed. "This is gonna take forever..."

XXX

"Good morning, Ms. Mar...pole...eee...Marpole. Marpole!" Max greeted Sylvia. "My dad needs a library card. Could you..." Silence follows. "...say your line?" He and Goofy laugh.

Sylvia blushed when she realizes she missed her cue. "Oh! Oh, sorry!" She laughed.

XXX

Sylvia grinned excitedly and stood up. "Oooh, gosh! Remember the Boogie Duck?"

"That was my all-time favorite!" Goofy exclaimed. He started quacking and acting like a duck. Sylvia laughs and plays along.

Donald Duck walks in randomly. "Hey, Goofy!" He waved as he walked by.

"Oh, hey, Donald!" Goofy stops dancing and waves to him. He does a double-take. "Donald? What are you doing in my movie?"

"...I have no idea."

XXX

At Club Rave, Max, PJ, and Bobby are enjoying as plate of nachos. An African American woman in a green mini dress approaches Max from behind.

"Hey, hi. I know you." The woman said smiling. "You're that awesome new skateboarder. Save a dance for me?"

Max tries to swallow his mouthful of nachos, but ends up choking. He wrings his neck and stomps his feet repeatedly.

PJ sighed and turned to Bobby. "Please tell me you know the Heimlich."

Bobby shook his head and shrugged. "Sorry, dude. I don't."

PJ looked at the woman hopefully. The woman shook her head. PJ sighed again in frustration. "'Course you don't..." He got up and performed the Heimlich on Max. His nachos shot out of his mouth, and hit Bobby, knocking him unconscious. Max fell to the ground gasping for breath.

XXX

"Save a dance for me?" Asked the woman.

Max swallowed. "No problem." He stared at the woman as she walked away.

PJ and Bobb6y spit their nachos out and burst out laughing. "You dance?"

Max raised an eyebrow. "Why are you surprise4d? I danced with Powerline!"

PJ and Bobby shrugged and looked at each other.

"Crappy writing and different director?" Bobby suggested.

"Oh, quit blaming it on me!" The director threw his hands up in frustration.

"But it's your fault!" Max pointed out. "You made me look like an ass!"

"You _are_ an ass, Max." PJ pointed out.

"Shut up, PJ!"

XXX

"It is endemic of the current culture that those with large stature are overlooked, except by vultures. With no regard for the depth of their souls, the height of their passion, the beauty of their moments." PJ lamented. Max and Bobby stared in surprise and shock. PJ raised an eyebrow at Max. "Why are _you_ surprised, Max? You know I've written poetry before!"

"...Yeah, well, the first movie wasn't in tune with Goof Troop either." Max shrugged and looked away.

XXX

Music plays as Sylvia walks out in a strapless green jumpsuit. She danced a little to the music and looked at Goofy seductively. Suddenly, a group of college men tackled Sylvia and started raping her. Sylvia started screaming in horror.

"Gawrsh..." Goofy looked on, concerned. He ran forward to save Sylvia.

The director looked disgusted. "...That is sick." 

(_Take 2_)

Sylvia comes out in her green jumpsuit and dances a little. Goofy is mesmerized. His ears fly backwards, and his collar flaps flap.

"DANCE ORGY!" Someone shouted out. Everyone screamed and started having sex with the first person they see.

"...Un-freaking-believable..." The director started shaking his head.

XXX

Sylvia and Goofy sit on a park bench enjoying the view.

"Oh, Goofy," Sylvia sighed and lay her head on his shoulder. "this is the best night of my life."

"Yeah. Mine, too." Goofy replied. He smiled. "'Cause Maxie was born in the mornin' and I got married in the afternoon. Ah-yuck!" Sylvia just stared at him. "...What?"


	11. The Director's Dirty Mind

Sylvia is putting books away on a ladder. Goofy runs in holding a bouquet of flowers.

"Oh, Sylviaaaa!" Goofy called in singsong. He jumped on the ladder causing it to slide down the bookshelf. The ladder stopped at the end and sent Sylvia flying. Goofy got into position and held his arms out to catch her. Sylvia fell to the floor behind Goofy. Goofy cringed. "Oooohhh..." He bent down next to Sylvia, who groaned in pain. "Are you okay?"

"Cut!"

XX

Bradley skates past Max knocking him and Bobby down, and causing PJ to spill his ice cream on his shirt.

"See you at the qualifying rounds, freshmen!" Bradley called over his shoulder.

"And after! When...I...think of a better comeback!" Max called back. PJ and Bobby laughed.

(Take 2)

"See you at the qualifying rounds, freshmen!" Bradley called over his shoulder.

"And after! When you'll be bringing me my towel...boy!" Max retorted.

"Nice job." Bobby commented. "You forgot to flip him off, but other than that, nice job!"

"Yeah, and that was kind of a lame comeback..." PJ commented.

"Yeah, well, I was raised by Goofy. What'd you expect?" Max stated.

"Good point."

XX

"...and that's time for Goofy!" Chuck, the announcer announced.

Goofy flew up the ramp, and past Tank's arm. Everyone laughed.

XX

Max growled in frustration. "Don't you get it? I'm trying to get away from you! I'm not a little kid anymore! Now just leave me alone, and get your own life!"

Goofy stared in shock. "'Get my own life'? Don't you understand that you are my life? I thought I meant something to you! I thought we shared something special!"

"Well, you thought wrong." Max folded his arms and turned around.

"But what about last night?" Goofy asked. "We had so much fun together!"

"What'd you guys do?" Asked the director.

"We baked cookies." Max explained. "Something I never want to do again!"

"Oh, come on. It wasn't _that_ bad!" Goofy said. "I mean, sure, we was all over the kitchen floor, but..."

The directors' eyes widened. _'Oh...my...God...'_

"...and you was moaning and groaning every ten minutes or so..." Goofy continued.

The director gagged in his mouth.

"Only 'cause you were riding me so hard." Max said. "My butt's still sore from that experience!"

"Oh, my God!" The director exclaimed in disgust. He ran to the bathroom.

Goofy, Max, and the cameraman looked after the director. "Gawrsh...must be coming down with somethin'."

The cameraman just stared at the Goofs. "Umm...so...you two...'baked cookies'...huh?"

"Sure did!" Goofy replied. He ran off, then came back with a plate of chocolate chip cookies. "Want one?"

The cameraman gave a huge sigh of relief. _'Oh, thank God! I thought they meant...' _"Sure! Don't mind if I do." He took a cookie and ate it. "Mmmm. This is really good."

"Ah-yuck. Thanks!" Goofy said, smiling.

_(Take 2)_

Goofy followed after Max in the hallway to the dorms. "Maxie! Hey, I've been lookin' all over for you, son." Max stopped, but didn't turn around. Goofy continued. "I can't tell you how sorry I am."

"Oh, save your breath!" Max snapped. "You may have won this time, but Dad...ohhh! This campus just isn't big enough for the both of us!"

"I didn't mean for it to turn out this way." Goofy said sadly. "I was just tryin' to get closer to ya."

Max growled in frustration. "Don't you get it? I'm trying to get away from you! I'm not a little kid anymore! Now, just leave me alone, and _get your own life_!" He storms off angrily.

Goofy stares numbly after his son as music started playing.

_All that work, and what did it get me?_

_Why did I do it?_

_Scrapbooks full of me in the background.  
Give 'em love, and what does it get ya?  
What does it get you?  
One quick look as each of 'em leaves you. _

Goofy walks in the opposite direction Max walked.

_All your life, and what does it get ya?  
Thanks a lot, and out with the garbage.  
They take bows, and you're battin' zero. _

Goofy then appears on a stage. Its' curtains are drawn.

_I had a dream.  
I dreamed it for you, Max.  
It wasn't for me, Max. And if it wasn't for me, then where would you be, _

_My little Maxie? _

_Well, someone, tell me; when is it my turn?  
Don't I get a dream for myself?  
Starting now, it's gonna be **my** turn!  
Gangway, world, get off of my runway!  
Starting now I bat a thousand!_

_This time, boys, I'm taking the bows and..._

_Everything's coming up Goof!  
Everything's coming up Goofy!  
Everything's coming up Goof! _

_This time for me (ah-yuck)!  
For me!  
For me!  
For me!  
For me! _

_Fooooor meeeeeee! Yeeaaah! _

The cameraman and the director just stared. "...Wow."

XXX

Goofy sits on a fountain, depressed. A bird flies over his head and poops on him. Goofy is too depressed to notice.

The crew laughed.

"Can that be part of the movie?" Asked the cameraman.

The director just slapped his forehead.

XXX

"Oh, Sylvia. I gotta get my grades up! And quit those dumb old Gammas! And most important-" Goofy was interrupted by someone shushing him. He whispered. "And most important, get my son back!"

Sylvia gasped. "Has he been kidnapped by Heartless and is being used as leverage against you?"

"What? No!"

"Oh. Well, it sounded like it..."

XXX


	12. Tick Tick, Boom

Max walked slowly towards the Bean Scene. Rain pattered down slowly on the rooftops. A brunette young woman walked past Max and stopped as she recognized him.

"Hey, I know you! Aren't you...?"

"Yeah. Max." Max turned around and smiled.

"Goofy's son! Oh, he is rad!" She exclaimed.

Max exploded. He screamed in rage and tackled the poor girl to the ground and started beating her up.

"MAX! STOP!" The director yelled. He and the cameraman rushed over to pull Max off the girl.

The girl got up and sniffed. "You're SO hurtful! NO WONDER NO ONE LIKES YOU!" She runs off crying.

"...She has a point, you know." The cameraman said. Max glared at him.

XX

Max slowly trudges down the stairs to the Bean Scene. Onstage was none other than Sora.

_'...Your hair is likened unto a blossoming rose,_

_O Kairi_

_I'd like to kiss you in the nose_

_O Kairi_

_You are my forever girl_

_O Kairi...Kairi..._

Sora sighed._ 'Kairi.' _He stepped back and people applauded. Max shook his head.

XX

"Bulls-eye, baby. Dog-boy's in trouble. And Daddy's gonna bail him out." Tank mocked.

Goofy frowned. "No siree, sir." He grabbed Bradley's stick and jammed it into Tank's foot, causing him to drop Goofy.

"Gah! My bunion!" Tank hopped up and down and clutched his foot in pain.

Goofy held the stick lengthwise against Bradley. "I'm not gonna be on anyone's team!"

Bradley grabbed hold of the stick and hopped onto the pool table. "Smart man. But you forgot one thing: nobody- I repeat- nobody quits the Gammas!"

Liam, Max's Nobody walked in holding a resignation form. "Hey, Bradley. Here's my letter of resignation."

"Okay. Just make sure your room's all cleaned out." Bradley said calmly to Liam.

"It is." Liam walked out and waved. "See ya."

"Now...where was I?" Bradley asked.

XXX

"I will _not_ be ignored." Bradley said through gritted teeth. He pulls out a remote trigger. "Nobody finishes this race but me!" Goofy doesn't say his line. Instead, he waits for Bradley to push the button. Nothing happens. "What the hell?" He pounded on the button, but nothing happens. Bradley growls in frustration and slams it on the ground. Still nothing happens.

_(Take 2)_

"Nobody finishes this race but me!" Bradley pushes the button, but instead of Max's skateboard going off, _Bradley's _skateboard goes off and zooms into Bradley, knocking him unconscious.

_(Take 3)_

"Nobody finishes this race but me!" Bradley pulls out a remote trigger. But before he could push the button, Simba leaps at him roaring. Bradley turned and gasped in horror. Simba pinned a screaming Bradley to the ground. Bradley gasped and stared in fear as Simba growled and glared at Bradley inches from his sweating face. Bradley felt his pants dampen a little.

"Thanks, Simba. I owe you one." Goofy said.

"No problem, Goofy." Simba replied. "Us Disney Dads have to stick together."

The director stared at the scene and slapped his forehead. "Un-freaking-believable..."

XXX

"Congratulations, son." Goofy ran up to the stage and opened his arms for a hug. Max smiles weakly and cringes a little. Bradley clears his throat. The Goofs turn to him, Max smiling politely and Goofy giving him the glare of death and clenching his fist.

"Congratulations, Max." Bradley said civilly. He extended his hand. "I haven't forgotten our agreement."

"Bet's off, Bradley." Max replied. "Though, I think you owe him something." Max pointed to Tank.

"Oh, you're damn right he does!" Goofy pushed past Max and whipped out Sora's keyblade and aimed it at Bradley. "Start running, asshole."

Bradley's eyes widened in horror and he sprinted off. Goofy chased after him. "YEAH, YOU BETTER RUN!"

Sora ran onstage shaking his fist at Goofy. "Next time ASK if you wanna borrow my keyblade!"

XXX

…**.Okay, that's all I got. Next chapter's deleted and alternate scenes.**


	13. Deleted Scenes

**Ok, I decided not to add a backstage chapter, so this is the last one. I also know that a lot of fans are pissed that Roxanne isn't in AEGM, so, I decided to add a few deleted scenes with her.**

**Never Say Good-bye**

Max stretched and yawned as he headed to his room. Tomorrow was the day he heads off to college! The phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Hey, you. It's me." Said a familiar voice.

Max beamed. "Roxanne! Hey! You getting ready for New York?"

Roxanne was accepted to New York University to study journalism. Max and his friends were going to Ohio State on athletic scholarships.

"Yeah." Roxanne replied. "It's a little scary, though. Stacy's going to Yale, you're going to Ohio State..." She sighed. "It's gonna be so lonely up there."

"Don't worry. You'll do great there." Max assured her. "You wouldn't have applied there if you weren't ready."

Roxanne smiled. "Remind me why we broke up."

Max chuckled softly. "Because long-distance relationships never work out, and we want to see different people."

"Right." Roxanne closed her eyes and nodded. "Well, good luck at college, Max."

"Thanks. You too." Max smiled. "Don't forget to catch me, Bobby, and PJ on TV when we win the X-Games."

"Now, what makes you so sure you'll win?" Roxanne smirked and put a hand on her hip.

"'Cause we're awesome!" Max stated simply. They both laugh. "I'll miss you, Roxy."

"I'll miss you, too." Roxanne whispered.

"Good-bye."

"I'll never say good-bye." Roxanne said. "See you later."

"See ya." Max slowly hung up and sighed sadly. He and Roxanne were together almost three years. At their senior prom, they slept together...Roxanne had a pregnancy scare. They decided to go their separate ways.

XX

**Orientation**

The freshmen were all in lines in the courtyard. Their Resident Advisors were giving them the information they need.

"...make sure you have your schedules and maps of the campus with you. Curfew is 10:00 PM, no exceptions. You can get your photo ID over there. That ID is your lifeline. It is your meal card, theater card, and student card. Keep it with you at all times. Don't take too long with your picture. If your photo doesn't turn out how you like it, too bad. You're stuck with it the rest of your college life. If you lose it, you can get a replacement." The RA took a breath and turned to another RA. "Turner hall?"

"No. Stevenson."

The first RA scoffed. "Bunch of lamers."

Max stepped up and sat on the stool. He smiled and blinked as the photographer snapped his photo. "Uh, can we do that again? I wasn't ready."

"One photo." The photographer said in a bored voice. Max sighed, took his ID, and walked off.

XX

**Who Let The Goofs In?**

After class, Max grabbed his father's wrist and pulled him outside. "Dad, _what_ are you _doing_ here?"

"I'm coming back to college." Goofy said smiling. "I never finished my senior year of college, so I decided to finish."

"Well...yeah, but...why _here_?" Max asked as they headed for the bookstore. "Why_ my_ college?"

"Because I don't wanna be away from my little Maxie." Goofy said simply. He hugged Max's shoulders and gave him a noogie. Max pushed him off and looked around nervously to make sure no one's watching. He sighed and rubbed his forehead.

XX

**Epilogue part 1 (AN: Epilogue part 2 would be the end scene where Max gives Goofy his graduation present):**

Roxanne saw the X-Games on TV and called Max up. She came to visit Max, who gave her the grand tour of campus. They sat down for coffee at the Bean Scene. Max recounted the events that occurred after the X-Games drama.

"Oh my God, you should have seen it." Max was saying. "So we get to the hospital where PJ and Bradley were taken, and Pete _loses_ it."

FLASHBACK:

Pete lunged for Bradley in rage. Goofy, Max, and Bobby hold him back.

"Hold onto him!" Max cried.

"Pete! Calm down!" Goofy pleaded. He and Max wrapped their arms around Pete's waist, while Bobby tugged on his shirt.

"HOW DARE YOU TRY TO KILL MY SON! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THE MEDICAL BILL IS GOING TO COST? A LOT!" Pete screamed angrily. Bradley just stared in shock and fear, Sylvia covered her mouth in shock, and PJ just put his face in his hands in dismay.

END FLASHBACK

Roxanne's eyes widened. "Geez!"

Max nodded. "Anyway, Bradley's dad showed up after that. He kept going on and on about how he disgraced the family, and his trust fund will go to the school, and as compensation money to those who were injured. Pete took his money, and yelled that he- Bradley's dad- was the worst father ever, which is coming from him- and apologized to my dad for thinking he was a bad dad."

"I bet Bradley was not happy." Roxanne shook her head.

"Well, considering he lost his reputation, his money, his dad's love and respect, plus his girlfriend dumped him, and he is expelled from OSU...I would not be surprised in the least if he ended his life." Max took a sip of his coffee.

"Come on. You shouldn't talk like that." Roxanne looked at him firmly.

"I know. Still..." Max smiled in thought. "You know, when you think about it, Max Goof has had a pretty good year."

Roxanne smiled at her friend. She was proud of him for what he did and how he handled the Bradley situation. She glanced over at PJ and Java (Beret Girl) making out on the couch. "Looks like PJ's had a good year, too."

Max followed her gaze and smiled. "Yeah. Despite the fact that there are three torn ligaments in both his feet, and he won't be able to skateboard for at least a year after physical therapy."

"What about your dad?" Roxanne asked.

"He is still dating Sylvia and is as annoying as ever." Max reported. Roxanne stared at him reproachfully. "But we made up."

Roxanne smiled and put her hands on Max's. "Do you think we still have a chance?"

Max was slightly surprised. "What do you mean?"

"I can't stop thinking about you." Roxanne admitted. "I'll be honest: I applied to Ohio State at first because I wanted to be with you. I applied to NYU as a backup in case we didn't work out. I got accepted for both, but, since we broke up, I chose NYU."

Max was surprised at this revelation. "So...what are you saying? You-you wanna transfer here?"

Roxanne nodded. "But...only if you want me to. I don't want things to be awkward between us."

Max beamed. "Yes! Yes, I-I want you to! But...I don't want you to give up your life in New York for me."

"I won't be." Roxanne replied. "I just can't stand to be away from the man I love."

Max smiled, touched. He stood up and kissed Roxanne over the table.

XXX

**Goofy's Karaoke Dance Party**

A huge crowd gathered in the courtyard of the college. Goofy stood on a stage holding a microphone. "Hello and welcome to the Goofy Karaoke Dance party!" Everyone cheered. "I would like to start with one of my personal favorites."

_**Carry on my wayward son**_

_**There'll be more when you are done**_

_**Lay your weary head to rest**_

_**Don't you cry no more**_

Max pulled a paper bag over his head in embarrassment. Later, he went up to sing.

_**That I don't ever wanna be like you  
I don't wanna do the things you do  
I'm never gonna hear the words you say  
And I don't ever wanna,  
I don't ever wanna be  
You **_

_**PJ:**_

_**I don't wanna be anything other than what I've been tryin' to be lately**_

_**All I can do is think of me and have piece of mind**_

_**Java:**_

_**Can't read my**_

_**Can't read my**_

_**No, he can't read my poker face**_

_**(Ain't got to love nobody)**_

_**Sylvia:**_

_**I made it through the wilderness**_

_**You know I made it through**_

_**I didn't know how lost I was until I found you**_

_**Tank:**_

_**Feelings...**_

_**Nothing more than feelings...**_

_**Brad:**_

_**I used to rule the world  
Seas would rise when I gave the word  
Now in the morning I sleep alone  
Sweep the streets I used to own **_

_**Bobby:**_

_**I'm all alone**_

_**There's nobody here beside me**_

_**My problems have all gone**_

_**There's nobody here to deride me**_

_**Chuck:**_

_**Cause I'm  
The Greatest Star  
I am by far!  
But no one knows it-wait  
They're gonna hear a voice **_

_**Ken:**_

_**Do you really want to hurt me**_

_**Do you really wanna make me cry?**_

_**Pete:**_

_**CRIMINAL  
CRIMINAL  
You god damn right  
I'm a CRIMINAL  
Yeah, I'm a CRIMINAL **_

_**Roxanne:**_

_**Constant cravings**_

_**Have always been**_

"SHE DOESN'T EVEN GO HERE!" Shouted a random student.

Max turned to glare at the student. "SHE'S TRANSFERRING HERE!"

_**Redhead girl and African-American brunette:**_

_**You can dance**_

_**You can jive**_

_**Having the time of your life**_

_**Ooh, see that girl**_

_**Watch that scene**_

_**Digging the dancing queen**_

_**PJ and Java:**_

_**I've had the time of my life**_

_**No, I've never felt this way before**_

_**Yes, I swear it's the truth**_

_**And I owe it all to you**_

_**Goofy:  
Don't go breaking my heart.**_

_**Sylvia:**_  
_**I couldn't if I tried**_

_**Goofy:**_  
_**Oh, honey if I get restless**_

_**Sylvia:**_  
_**mmm, baby you're not that kind.**_

_**PJ:  
Don't go breaking my heart**_

_**Java:**_  
_**You take the weight off of me**_

_**PJ:**_  
_**Oh, Honey when you knock on my door**_

_**Java:**_  
_**Ooh I gave you my key**_

_**Both:**_  
_**Ooh Ohh**_  
_**Nobody knows it.**_  
_**When I was down**_  
_**I was your clown**_  
_**Ooh ooh**_  
_**Nobody knows it.**_  
_**Right from the start**_  
_**I gave you my heart.**_  
_**Ohhhhhhh oh**_  
_**I gave you my heart**_

_**PJ:  
So don't go breaking my heart**_

_**Java:**_  
_**I won't go breaking your heart**_

_**Both:**_  
_**Don't go breaking my heart**_

_**Goofy:**_  
_**And nobody told us**_

_**Sylvia:**_  
_**'Cause nobody showed us**_

_**Goofy:**_  
_**And now it's up to us babe**_

_**Sylvia:**_  
_**Ooh,I think we can make it**_

_**Goofy:**_  
_**So don't misunderstand me**_

_**Sylvia:**_  
_**You put the light in my life**_

_**PJ:**_  
_**You put the sparks to the flame**_

_**Java:**_  
_**I've got your heart in my sights**_

_**All:**_  
_**Ohh Ohh**_  
_**Nobody knows it**_  
_**But,**_  
_**When I was down**_  
_**ooh**_  
_**Ohh**_  
_**I was your clown.**_  
_**Nobody knows it,**_  
_**right from the start**_  
_**I gave you my heart.**_  
_**Ohhhhh oh**_  
_**I gave you my heart**_

_**PJ:**_  
_**Don't go breaking my heart**_

_**Java:**_  
_**I won't go breaking your heart**_

_**PJ:**_  
_**Don't go breaking my heart**_

_**Java:**_  
_**Oooh Ohh**_  
_**I give you my heart**_

_**Goofy:**_  
_**Don't go breaking my heart**_

_**Sylvia (Goofy):**_  
_**Won't go breaking your heart (don't go breaking my,don't go breaking my)**_

_**Goofy (Sylvia):**_  
_**Don't go breaking my heart (don't go breaking my,don't go breaking my)**_

_**Java (PJ):**_  
_**I won't go breaking your heart (don't go breaking my,don't go breaking my)**_

_**PJ (Java):**_  
_**Don't go breaking my heart (don't go breaking my,don't go breaking my)**_

_**Java:**_  
_**I won't go breaking your heart**_

_**All:**_  
_**Oooh Ooooh**_  
_**Yeah**_

_**Max and Roxanne:**_

_**It's a quarter after one**_

_**I'm all alone and I need you now**_

_**Said I wouldn't call but I lose all control**_

_**And I need you now**_

Everybody started dancing.

_**Bobby:**_

_**Everybody dance now!**_

_**Eveerbody dance now!**_

_**All:**_

_**Dance to the music**_

_**Dance to the music**_

"Max, you ain't dancing yet!" Bobby noticed.

_**Dance to the music**_

_**Dance to the music...**_

THE END!

**Song list (in order of appearance):**

**Carry On My Wayward Son- Kansas**

**The Anthem- Good Charlotte**

**I Don't Wanna Be- Gavin DeGraw**

**Poker Face- Lady Gaga**

**Like A Virgin- Madonna**

**Feelings- Morris Albert**

**Viva La Vida- Coldplay**

**Friends- Bette Midler**

**I Am The Greatest Star- Funny Girl**

**Do You Really Want To Hurt Me- Boy George**

**Criminal- Eminem**

**Constant Craving- k. d. Lang**

**Dancing Queen- Abba**

**(I've Had) The Time of My Life- Dirty Dancing**

**Don't Go Breaking My Heart- Elton John and Kiki**

**Need You Now- Lady Antebellum**

**Everybody Dance Now (Gonna Make You Sweet)- C + C Music Factory**

**Dance To The Music- Sly and the Family Stone**


	14. Alternate Ending

**So, have you guys seen the TV show Popular? The series ended with a car speeding towards a blonde girl. The girl screamed in fright, the screen went white, and that was it. I also imagined a similar alternate ending with An Extremely Goofy Movie. So...I know I said this story is over, but I forgot about this alt ending I had in mind. So...THIS is the last chappy. 'Kay?**

"Okay, hugfesters..." Bobby said from his perch eating pizza. "Free eats at the dorm-a. Pizza double cheese-a!" He stuffs a slice of pizza in his mouth. "Scrumptious!"

Max chuckled and put a hand on his dad's shoulder. "Come on, Dad. Let's feast."

From behind them, a car horn honked. They turned around to see Sylvia waving from Goofy's convertible. "Oh, no thanks, son. I kinda got plans of my own."

"You know, I'm glad you came. I mean, sure it was rough at the start, but it turned out to be a pretty cool thing. You being here at college with me." Max said to Goofy as he walked him to the car. "But now it's over, and we'll be going to our own lives, and..."

"You didn't tell him, yet?" Sylvia asked Goofy with an edge of humor in her voice.

"Oh, I wanted to surprise him." He replied. He turned to Max. "Son, guess what? I got me a job right on campus!"

Max was taken aback. All his doubts and judgements about his father came rushing back. "You-you what? But...I thought you...you told me you were gonna-"

"Just kidding." Goofy smiled and started driving off. "Ah-yuck. Ah-ho-ho-ho-ho!"

Max sighed inwardly with relief and smiled as Goofy's graduation cap flew off his head and swirled through the air and landed at Max's feet. He picked up the cap and dusted it off. "He is so goofy." He said to himself. Max sobered up when he heard a car accelerating. He turned around to see a very beyond furious Bradley behind the wheel of his car speeding towards Max. Max threw up his hands in surrender and screamed in horror.

_CRASH!_

**And that my friends is why Max is never seen again! XD **

**...Oh, wait, his last appearance was Mickey's Twice Upon A Christmas, huh? Well, it was a nice Max-ilogue. That's a Max epilogue.**

**PS- Don't worry- Max lives. He has to appear in House of Mouse and Mickey's Twice Upon A Christmas, right? XD  
**


End file.
